Jack Marshall

Peppermint and sparkles. Sour apple and sandalwood shavings. Wild orchid, black cherries, and seedless grapes. Raspberry and dachshund urine. Pine, lemongrass, and blue-tit. Shea butter and soft blanket, whatever the hell that’s supposed to be. Fondled pomegranate and regret. Pepper, fig, and moss. Eucalyptus, watermelon pips, and pennies. Kiwi and wet soil.

The Oxford comma is one of the most controversial, contentious, and disputed issues in grammar, which sounds like an oxymoron because it is: a literary squabble is about as lacklustre, droopy, and indifferent a kerfuffle as you’re likely to find.