Joan review: Sophie Turner stands out among the 80s chart bangers, but this tale of a criminal mastermind isn't the pick of the pops
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For a child of the 80s, it was – as the kids say – banger after banger, from Wham's Club Tropicana to KC and the Sunshine Band, ABC and Culture Club.
And Turner – best known as Sansa Stark in epic dragons-and-backstabbings saga Game of Thrones – is icily magnificent as the real-life Joan Hannington, striding about in a succession of shirt dresses and trailing a cloud of Elnet hairspray from her blonde, back-combed barnet.
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Hide AdJoan was a struggling single mum living in Kent with a violent, possessive small-time hood. Trying to escape some heavies who have come after her partner's debts, she puts her daughter into care while she heads to her sister's place in London to find her fortune and stability for her family.
There are some nice scenes between Joan and her daughter, and Turner's wide-eyed pleading with the social services really tugs on the heartstrings.
“It's definitely just temporary, I won't lose her, will I?” she pleads as her daughter goes to live with foster parents. “Promise me I won't lose her.”
She blags her way into a job in a swanky London jewellery store, and her good looks and confidence soon see her getting the trust of the manager, as she charms the rich clients into parting with their money.
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Hide AdBut stability isn't enough for our Joan, having been given a small taste of the high life by her old boyfriend – fur coats and rides in a soft-top Porsche – she wants more, and is soon swallowing diamonds from the jeweller's safe and trying to fence them through an exceedingly dodgy antiques shop owner called Boisie (Frank Dillane).
There are intimations here of the criminal mastermind Joan would later become, but the first two episodes really take their time scene-setting, with Joan still under the thumb of the various men which flit through her life – from her deadbeat former partner Gary, to the suavely possessive Boisie and the various thugs which threaten her from time to time.
On a trip to Spain to fence some stolen goods, she meets Boisie's criminal pal Albie and his wife Val – who seems unaware about her husband's nefarious activities, or at least uncaring and unconcerned about where the money for their sunshine good life comes from.
Joan recognises that there are problems with being such a passive accomplice – especially when the police come calling.
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Hide Ad“I'm never going to be like Val,” she tells Boisie. “I need to run my own life.”
There's precious little evidence of that happening, so far, though as Joan goes back to Boisie after she'd previously vowed to undertake “just one job”.
There's also the inherent problem with shows like this, because the central character is, let's face it, a criminal.
There's an element of Joan being a Robin Hood type figure – she's only a criminal because she wants to do well by her daughter.
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Hide AdThere's also a more modern sensibility here, of a woman finding a way to empowerment against the sleazy, violent men she encounters.
But while it can be a vicarious thrill watching criminals do their ingenious thing, but there's also little evidence of their victims here – the people losing their family heirlooms, or what little money they might have.
And even when her sister gives her a place to stay and a job in the hair salon she runs, Joan can't resist ruining it, with the shakiest of motivations.
An episodic, slow-paced first two episodes are saved by Turner and the Proustian rush of the songs, the fashions and the cars.
So while it’s not the pick of the pops, let's just hope the remaining instalments add up to more than the sum of its parts.
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