It's my first Mother's Day without my 14-year-old son - I put a brave face on but underneath it’s so painful
Today is Mother’s Day and while many revel in the flowers and various gifts provided by their loved ones, for some, it is a day that further heightens their loss.
One mum who has opened up about how her grief is affecting her on her first Mother’s Day since losing her 14-year-old son in the hope of helping others with her honesty, is Kim Morgan.
Kim, who is originally from Lancaster, but now lives in Kendal, has said her family has been left in a pit of grief ever since her son’s death on Easter Sunday last year.
14-year-old Ryan Liam Morgan from Morecambe, who was a passenger in a van driven by his dad, suffered serious injuries and was pronounced dead at the scene on Sunday, April 20, after the Peugeot van in which he was a passenger left the M6 southbound carriageway between junctions 34 and 33 and crashed into a tree.
Ryan’s dad Daniel Burba, who had never passed a driving test, suffered an epileptic fit behind the wheel and it later emerged the 31-year-old had ignored warnings by doctors not to drive due to his risk of seizures.
Burba, of Arnside Crescent, Morecambe, pleaded guilty to causing death while uninsured and driving without a license.
He was told he must serve at least two-thirds of a 10-year prison sentence and has been disqualified from driving for 14 years and five months and also told he must take an extended re-test if he ever wants to get behind the wheel again.
While every day brings unbearable grief, holidays such as Christmas and Mother’s Day serve as another cruel reminder of Kim’s loss.
She said: “I’m not coping to be honest, I cried myself to sleep last night, it’s like screaming all the time but nothing’s coming out. Every day I put a brave face on but underneath it’s so painful.
“I used to tell the kids all I’d like is a bunch of daffodils for Mother’s Day as they’re my favourite, but now I’ve been transforming our garden slowly so I can make it a memory garden filled with colours and fragrance so I’m throwing myself into that which is taking my mind off things for a while, but at night my mind goes straight back to the crash.”
She added: “I do feel like Ryan’s with me, I talk to him constantly and I’d like to think he knows how much I love him, it should be comforting knowing he’s at peace now and I believe I’ll see him again one day but it’s fast coming up to a year since he’s been gone and it’s zero comfort at all I just keep asking him why did it have to be him.”
Bereavement support
If you are struggling and need need someone to talk to there are many organisations wanting to help.
Samaritans is a registered charity aimed at providing emotional support to anyone in emotional distress, struggling to cope or at risk of suicide throughout the United Kingdom a
You can call them for free any time, day or night - call 116 123.
They won't judge you or tell you what to do, and you can call them for free any time, day or night - call 116 123.
Lancashire Teaching Hospitals Bereavement Support Group helps anybody who has been affected by death.
The group meets monthly, however individual support and telephone support is also available on arrangement.
Child bereavement UK helps children and young people (up to age 25), parents and families, to rebuild their lives when a child grieves or when a child dies.
View more information on the Child Bereavement UK website.
Telephone: 0800 028 8840.