Diggin' the dancing queen

There are some things in life that take you by surprise.

For many of us early 40-somethings, it is our age which catches us out: on more than one occasion I have asked who that old, balding git in a photograph is, only to be told the unpalatable truth.

But it is my recent pang of sympathy for our Prime Minister which has caught me most by surprise. I really didn’t think it was possible to feel remotely sorry for Theresa May, the woman who has managed to make a tripe sandwich out of a sow’s ear.

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Rather than her shortcomings as a leader of a G7 nation, it is her lack of natural rhythm which has seen me, albeit temporarily, join Team Theresa in the past week. Some commentators described her performances at functions in South Africa, and later in Nairobi, as cringeworthy and the worst ever dancing by a politician.

Pessimistic Remainers (perish the thought) reckoned the routine, which featured a 360 degree reverse shuffle, served as a disco-based metaphor for the aforementioned negotiations to leave the EU. No, it didn’t make for pretty viewing, which is why my heart went out to our PM as I too possess the natural grace of a broken rocking horse.

At any family function, landmark birthday bash or even a kids’ disco, I take it upon myself to commandeer the dance floor in order to show everybody else how it is done. I am acutely aware that rather than John Travolta in his Saturday Night Fever pomp, I actually more closely resemble a plate of jelly rotating in a microwave.

But, do you know what? I could not give two hoots as, when I am letting all hang out, I really could not be happier, which is kind of how May looked as she conducted her own brand of ‘dancefloor diplomacy’ last week. There are some of us who are never, ever, going to get maximum points from the Strictly judges, but the beauty of dancing is that it is open to everybody.

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Whether or not she survives the next few months before the intended B-Day next March remains to be seen but one thing is for sure, Theresa May will continue to enjoy a dance long after her career comes to an end. Whenever that may be.