Who's the Daddy: After midnight with the kids

It’s not every day that you get to celebrate your 21st birthday –however some of us are lucky enough to do it twice.

Saturday, 20th November 2021, 12:30 pm

Daughter #1 turned 22 this week, but seeing as how her 21st last year was a Covid lockdown washout, she marked it in some style in a private bar above one of Lancaster’s finest hostelries with 30 or so friends and the help of a very busy barman.

It all passed off without serious incident. Everyone chipped in on the playlist with a couple of their favourite tunes, the music got louder as the night went on and the evening was crowned by daughter #1’s note perfect and enthusiastic rendition of Lady Gaga’s Alejandro, bellowed down a mic that you’d have to prise from her cold, dead hand. The boss was even dragged up to dance to Sweet Caroline, cheered on by a youthful crowd who pumped out the lyrics like a victory anthem. It was one of those nights.

Her friends are a good bunch. But it’s only when you’re in a room with dozens of vibrant, indestructible 20-somethings who are “out out” that you realise you haven’t been the bright young thing for some time.

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Who is the Daddy

Me, the boss, daughter #2 and her boyfriend bowed out at a respectable 1am, daughter #1 and her boyfriend rolled in somewhere around 5am after painting the town a deep shade of scarlet. But not before we went to the after party in one of Lancaster’s late bars. And when you’re stone cold sober, such places really are a sight to behold.

It looked like a Cold War Steve hellscape. All that was missing was a naked, porcine Boris Johnson scuttling away from the mess he created and a cackling Jacob Rees-Mogg counting his gold while children starve.

Utterly terrifying. We lasted about 10 minutes before saying our goodbyes, stopping off at McD’s that at 1am had the militarised feel of a heavily guarded battlefield medical unit, and back home to let the dog out for a wee.

But the fun doesn’t stop there. Daughter #1’s present from her boyfriend included a weekend trip to Berlin. So they can celebrate it all over again. Last time I was there it was so cold the dregs of our beer froze in our plastic mugs at Hertha v Hannover. Definitely big coat weather.