Have I turned my straighteners off? #modernproblems

The menace that is a hair straightenerThe menace that is a hair straightener
The menace that is a hair straightener
They call it a modern problem.

One that in the scale of problems in the world is hardly pressing yet despite this has earned its own hashtag - which in itself is a modern problem.

(Did you hear the one about musical students calling sharps - hashtags? But that’s a whole other column).

Our #modernproblems are many.

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But one garnered a remarkable reaction in the world of Twitter and resonates with millions.

The thread ‘Have I turned my hair straighteners off’ went viral which is entirely understandable.

Frankly there is nothing worse (well there is - frizzy hair maybe?).

Personally I have a love/hate relationship with my straighteners, even though I use them only on special occasions like parties, meeting world leaders, showing off, or the rare occasion I can bothered for work.

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This is extremely lucky for my dad, who has found himself my superhero of choice.

He reckons he has been dispatched with his cape on more than 10 occasions to check I have turned them off after anxious phonecalls, usually in whispered panic from airports, toilets at swanky award dos or after a few shandys at the Christmas party.

Once I got all the way to Greece before he was sent flying off to my house to save the day.

Luckily he doesn’t live that far away and is quite a nice chap.

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I can’t even count the number of times I have driven practically all the way to work and had to turn back after that terrifying, anxious feeling of doom descends telling me I must go home again and check.

Those days when I start panicking a little late to return home, I anxiously scour the Fire and Rescue websites for a house fire in the vicinity.

Once I got the reporter on duty to ring up our local firefighters and check.

And sometimes I only start worrying on the way home, scanning the skyline for smoke.

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Taxi drivers’ profits have undoubtedly soared due to me almost arriving at destinations before turning around so I can run back into the house in panic.

And I know I’m not alone.

A comprehensive survey of the one person sitting next to me (female), revealed horror stories of burn marks on furniture and worse.

But do you know what?

For all that, I have never, ever, actually left them turned on.

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