Blaise Tapp: Buttercups and daisies is where my knowledge of nature ends

While I’ve never had an ambition to run my own branch of Bettabuy, I’m firmly of the belief that being curious about the world around you means that life is never, ever boring. Granted, having the ability to retain useless snippets of trivia for decades can be a little tedious for my nearest and dearest, especially, I’m told, when I interrupt Mrs Tapp’s favourite programmes to inform her that a particular actor also appeared in Bergerac in 1985.

Having a mind full of ‘facts’ is always handy when it comes to pub quizzes, although I’m in serious trouble whenever the subjects switch from sport, current affairs and popular culture before 2005, to literature or the natural world. If you’re on my team, you might as well ask the venue’s Staffordshire Bull Terrier for help.

My ignorance of genuinely useful facts has never been more exposed than it was last weekend during a weekend’s camping trip, when I had little choice but to get to grips with nature. During a hike that lasted the best part of three hours, there were a number of occasions that I regretted that I was unable to tell the young cub scouts in our party something interesting about our surroundings.

I’m now at the stage of life that I’m slightly embarrassed I can identify only a handful of trees and my flower knowledge is sketchy at best, beyond buttercups and daisies. Then there’s the wildlife. On Sunday morning, I had the absolute privilege of waking up, under canvas, to the joyous sound of birdsong but I couldn’t tell you what species I was listening to. I just wish I’d paid more attention to Bill Oddie when he was on the box because, after wood pigeons, I’m really struggling.

I’m not sure how much the Tapp children or anyone else for that matter would appreciate it if I went full Chris Packham at this stage in life, but I want to be able to better understand what I’m looking at when I venture into the countryside and I don’t want to be the guy who Googles weeds.

It’s a shame that it has taken me this long but I’ve reached the stage in life when stretching one’s legs in the fresh hair is a pleasure rather than a chore. I now want to have at least some knowledge to back it up with.