Clandestine clots wilt under icy public gaze

The convulsions rattling Labour to its marrow this past year frequently call to mind a sketch called '˜Son of the Invisible Man', a rare bright spot in a truly terrible 1987 comedy film called Amazon Women on the Moon.

Monday, 4th July 2016, 6:37 am
Updated Monday, 4th July 2016, 8:42 am
LEP Columnist Barry Freeman

In this hilarious routine, a stereotypical mad scientist, bandaged all over, regales an associate with boasts about how he has mastered the secret of invisibility.

Cackling wildly he begins unwinding the bandages to reveal...

That he isn’t invisible at all.

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He is, however, barmy enough to believe he is, and proceeds to further undress and dash around lifting objects, waving them in the air, shouting things like: ‘Have you ever seen a shirt make a phone call? Ooooooo!!’

This popped up in my thoughts again early last week as the Parliamentary Labour Party launched its most ambitious challenge to Jeremy Corbyn thus far.

For even as the Shadow Cabinet walked out en masse there appeared on social media a link to a Daily Telegraph article outlining the precise nature and tactics of the coup (which presented itself as a spontaneous response to Corbyn’s failure to campaign successfully for the UK to remain in the EU) written a full 10 days BEFORE said vote even took place. The non-invisible man capered in my thoughts again when evidence emerged which suggested Angela Eagle (who resigned on Monday in response, she claimed, to the sacking of Hillary Benn in the small hours of Sunday) might also be something of a seer.

How else to explain website registration data showing a domain chosen for her leadership campaign website ‘angela4leader.org’ was registered (by a former special adviser to Tony Blair) not only before Eagle resigned, but on the Saturday evening BEFORE Benn was sacked.It is, of course, impossible to be surprised. Now more than 12 months into an anti-Corbyn campaign notable only for its extreme and highly public ineptitude I have long been convinced the PLP don’t actually think we can see their machinations. The week ended with them vocally blasting Corbyn for comparing Israel to ISIS when the whole world can simply watch a clip of said outrage to confirm this categorically did not happen.

Right there in front of your face they prance, naked and deranged. ‘I haven’t come up with an agent to make myself visible again, but who cares? I’m having a ball!’