I wrote the law and the law won (for Dave)

LP Columnist Barry Freeman
LP Columnist Barry Freeman
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Okay, let’s see, I’m writing this column Friday morning, it took David Cameron four days to admit he HAD, after all his many denials, trousered a hefty sum from his dad’s offshore investment wheeze, the column comes out Monday, and so what, I wonder, will be the state of play by the time LEP readers glance disinterestedly at this article for a moment before swiftly turning the page?

Impossible to say.

Assuming the confessional growth to be exponential – soaring from absolutely NO cash benefits last Monday to at least 30 grand come Thursday – nothing can be off the table. Who knows, perhaps by today he is explaining exactly how Sam Cam’s wedding ring came to be made of gold from the Brinks Mat job (the raiders being among Ian Cameron’s fellow customers at Panamanian law firm Mossack Fonseca, who knew, according to Panorama, that they were helping launder the proceeds of the infamous bullion raid).

Still, as a succession of increasingly desperate Tory mouthpieces have been insisting in newspapers and TV news studios, what IS all the fuss about the fortune our Prime Minister and his family made out of an offshore investment fund which paid not one penny of UK tax?

After all, no laws have been broken!

And you know, they can say that with absolute confidence – as there is no need to break any laws.

British laws in this regard have long been the end result of an openly acknowledged connivance between the finance industry and governments keen to bend over backwards (and forwards) for the world’s moneyed elite.

Every regulation has been artfully drafted, loopholes designed and deftly woven into every clause and sub-clause, specifically to ensure that supertankerloads of dough can be shipped easily out of the country and stashed in one of the many secretive British tax havens dotted around the globe.

Havens which have rightfully earned this country a global reputation as the place to start if you have dirty money you want washed clean.

So come off it Corbyn, Guardianistas and sundry Trots! You know damned well no laws have been broken!

What kind of imbecile would break a law crafted solely for the purpose of making their chosen course of action legal?