Blaise Tapp: I’ve realised I am also not as tall as the man I used to be

While I was aware that people shrink as they get older, I always presumed that was the sort of thing that strikes once folk reach their 80s and take up bridge while developing a penchant for boiled sweets.

What I didn’t bank on was that I would be joining the ranks of the nation's shrinkers before reaching my half century.

After nearly 30 years of happily being a six footer, I’ve just learned that I’m no longer able to make that proud boast, given that I appear to have shrunk by around half an inch since the last time I was measured about 10 years ago.

It might not sound like an awful lot but it makes all the difference to me because our kitchen wall height chart - which logs how tall everyone in our extended family and beyond is - now shows me to be five foot, 11 inches and three quarters.

At first I thought I was the victim of a cruel prank by our eldest – who could easily dislodge me as being the tallest person in our house - or that there was a kink in the tape measure, but the wall doesn’t lie and, as I’ve since found out, neither does nature.

Since my unpleasant experience with the tape, I’ve disappeared down something of an internet rabbit hole to learn that it is uncommon for men to start shrinking in their 30s and can lose an inch by the time they start drawing a pension.

Women get an even tougher deal as they can lose up to two inches during middle age apparently, although I do take most things that I read online with more than a pinch of salt.

In the past year I’ve lost three stone, which has done wonders for my BMI but has also stopped people from describing me as a big bloke, a label that has been applied to me since the days when I sported a fetching pair of curtains.

While I’m chuffed that I’m as healthy as I have been in about 15 years, I’ve always liked being easy to spot in a large crowd but now have to face facts and accept that I’m not the man I used to be.