The Apprentice 2016: the 18 candidates desperate to impress Lord Alan Sugar

This year's contestants for BBC's The Apprentice are a modest bunch.

Friday, 30th September 2016, 10:13 am
Updated Wednesday, 5th October 2016, 2:07 pm
Modest bunch

Just kidding.

They’re as obnoxious and full of themselves as ever.

Their opening sentences, designed to impress Lord Alan Sugar, always manage to infuriate the rest of us.

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Dillon St Paul

Here's this years cringe-enducing batch:

Courtney Wood: “How would I describe myself in one sentence? I’ll give you one word: awesome.”

Dillon St. Paul: “Sometimes batting the eyelashes can get you a lot in business. Hence, the mascara comes in handy – so they can see those lashes.”

Oliver Nohl-Oser: “Sometimes I feel like James Bond when I’m in my suit.”

Karthik Nagesan

Frances Bishop: “I’m a pocket rocket. I’m quite fiery and live the rule ‘kill them with kindness’.”

Jessica Cunningham: “A motto I live by is: there is no competition if you’re already winning.”

Karthik Nagesan: “If I wanted to be like everyone else, I’d have waxed my monobrow.”

Samuel Boateng: “My creativity, my passion, my charm, and my likeability all roll into one, creating one perfect guy.”

Michelle Niziol

Mukai Noiri: “I feel sorry for Lord Sugar because previous applicants have been weak.”

Natalie Hughes: “I started at a young age, I’m a hustler, I’ve got the hustler’s ambition.”

Paul Sullivan: “I’ll play the team when I need to be part of the team, but I’m here to win; I’m not here to make up the numbers.”

Rebecca Jeffery: “People often foolishly mistake my enthusiasm for silliness or positivity for naivety. I’m proof that you can get things done without whinging.”

Dillon St Paul

Sofiane Khelfa: “The best survivors in the world are the people who adapt, and I’m the best at adapting. I’m like a chameleon. I adapt to anything, anywhere, anytime.”

Trishna Thakra: “My only tactic is to be myself; this alone will make sure I win.”

Alana Spencer: “I am incredibly hard working, driven, and I’ll stop at nothing to get what I want.”

Aleksandra King: “Like the Tasmanian devil in the famous cartoon, I will torpedo my way through to the win.”

Grainne McCoy: “I need guidance and a little bit of mentoring to help me make that first million.”

JD O’Brien: “I won’t suffer fools. I will get upset by other candidates who don’t know their arse from their elbow.”

Karthik Nagesan

Michelle Niziol: “I work 15 to 17 hours every day. 100 per cent, I’m a workaholic.”

Michelle Niziol