I’ve finally joined the four-eyed club.
Well finally if you discount the scores of pairs of sunglasses bought and lost over the years.
After months of complaining about my sight, a prolonged spell of dizziness finally prompted overdue action.
When a quick internet search of my symptoms (we know we shouldn’t, but just can’t help ourselves) revealed I could be suffering from anything from low blood pressure to a brain tumour, an appointment with the local GP was swiftly booked. Convincing myself I had some kind of horrid disease, I shook slightly as I revealed my symptoms to the Doc and, just to help her out, details of my search engine diagnosis.
‘OK,’ she said, smiling. ‘Let’s book you in for some blood tests. And I’d advise going to an optician, if you haven’t already done so.’
Was that it? I wasn’t being whisked to A&E immediately?
‘Unless you’re worried about anything else you read on the internet’.
One still isn’t sure if this was meant to be as patronising as it sounded.
I left without giving an honest answer. There are a lot of things I’m worried about I’ve stumbled across online. Didn’t want to open that box.
Blood tests out of the way, I took the doctor’s advice and headed to Boots, reddening slightly when I revealed that my last eye test was at least 10 years ago.
Seems things have changed in the last decade. All I remember from my last visit was a chart I pretended I couldn’t read, and an optician with questionable body odour.
Now, there are air-puffers, cameras and a spot the dot competition. Not sure they’re the correct technical terms, but you see (no pun intended) where I’m coming from.
Only after the eye torture does anyone actually check your vision.
‘More than a little short-sighted’ was the result. “Less than surprised,” came my answer.
But choosing frames proved less of a headache and sporting lenses has since proved a revelation.
Particularly when a woman stopped me and asked for directions to the closest tube station.
Looking down the street, I spotted the bright blue and red underground sign in the distance.
‘It’s there!’ I said excitedly . ‘I can see the light!’