Are you a fan of the face fluff?

Aasma Day
Aasma Day
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A very scientific test into whether women really like a man with a beard.

To prove that I don’t discriminate in any way, I will today discuss a topic on almost the opposite end of the scale – the issue of beardiness.

Brad Pritt

Brad Pritt

I’ll be frank – I’ve never been a fan of face fluff and have always felt that men with beards must have something to hide.

And apparently, I’m not alone as a study has revealed that women don’t find beards attractive and have ruled that being bearded makes men seem older and more aggressive.

I decided to do my own scientific piece of research and while enjoying a few drinks with some girl friends, I posed the question: “Men with beards: creepy or sexy?”

My friends deduced that big beards were a turn off but a bit of designer stubble is sexy.

I have to agree.

Brad Pitt with a clean cut and fresh faced look? Nice. Brad Pitt with some designer stubble? Very nice. Brad Pitt with a scraggy and matted beard? Not so nice.

My Hubby is usually clean shaven, but a few years ago, he did flirt with a bit of facial fuzz and grew himself a goatee beard.

In fact, come to think of it, it looked a bit like the one sported by Walt out of Breaking Bad.

At first, I found it all a bit too strange as not only did he not look like my Hubby, it was a bit scratchy.

But then just as I had got used to it and decided I liked it after all, he only went and shaved it off!

While I don’t have anything personally against men who choose to grow beards, they do seem rather unhygienic and some bearded men look like they really need a good wash - and I’m not just talking about tramps.

Seeing bits of food and crusty dried-up soup hiding among the bristles of someone’s beard is very off putting.

It also makes conversation with them very difficult as you can’t help staring with fascination trying to see how many mealtime remains you can spot.

It also seems to me that men with beards must be a tad lazy. You have to ask yourself, if they can’t be bothered to shave, what else are they skipping on when it comes to grooming habits?

My mistrust of men with beards isn’t helped by the fact that some men that seemed like friendly twinkly eyed bearded chappies turned out to be BAD men. Harold Shipman and Rolf Harris to name just two.

And don’t get me started on Father Christmas – most children’s first encounter with a bearded fellow – surely leaving them mentally scarred for life.

I mean, who can fully trust a man who actively encourages little children to sit on his knee and tell him whether they’ve been naughty?

However, there is some good news for bearded gents. According to this study I read, having a beard commands respect.

I will concede, there are some men who look very distinguished with a beard and their facial hair gives them an air of gravitas.

University professors and the like can carry off a beard well – but there’s no getting back from the fact that a beard adds years on to a bloke’s appearance and makes him look serious – or even downright angry.

There are some pros for men who choose to sprout a beard. Firstly, it is excellent insulation from the cold – meaning no need for balaclavas.

A beard also has the advantage of hiding any unfortunate chins. Or unsightly blemishes or pimple scars.

Allegedly, a beard can also keep you healthy. As well as offering protection from the sun and preventing sunburn on at least half your face, a beard can catch allergens such as dust and pollen before they are breathed in and help ward off hay fever, allergies and even asthma.

While I may not naturally be drawn to men with beards, I will admit that some fellows do suit beards well and are so unimaginable without one, that it would be a real shame if they took a razor to their face.

But there are some people that beards DEFINITELY don’t look right on.

Namely women.